batch ke4 (III)

i was in love with this girl from the very first day.
in love by the way she introduced her friend.
cool, i smiled to myself. a creative one in my class.
in all of my 4 classes, come to think of it.
her friend introduced her as Bean.
haa, bean??
"u know, like Mr Bean."
ah well :)

in mid semester, i was heart-brokened when she announced her topic
in a speaking lesson. "i want to talk about my girlfriend".
i'm sorry, who?
looking straight into my eyes, she repeated "my girlfriend". it jabbed my heart.
the intonation was sharp. tinggi jugak ego dia. i smiled sampai dia tertunduk.
but listening to her beautiful speech, i knew there's a little spark in her heart.
she's in love, and that's just it.

i had her in my twitter list at the end of semester.
boy, her tweets would be up to 30+ a day,
most of them would be about her sayang. about her sayang.
this subahat feeling kept haunting me for weeks, cuz the only thing i said
to her at the end of the jamuan kelas was "berubah ya Bean" in her right ear.
so i would always tutup sebelah mata and skip her tweets whenever i see her.
u see, the only thing that stopped me from reaching the cursor to the unfollow
button was to see how can this lovely girl change. remember that little spark?
yea, that.

one evening, i retweeted a post from her, not knowing what her whole story was.
a tweet that it alone seemed like a very useful advice even for myself.
she actually responded to my tweet; clueless, she said.
little did i know the actual situation that i had put myself into was rather tough.
but i love her, this fragile student. all she needed was light;
i don't know if i am one.
so there i was, diving into sea of sharks.

untuk awk Bean, after all pun jadi la.

hari-hari sy doakan moga Allah cerahkan hati awk.

moga ada boy yang buat awk jatuh hati, 

mcm sy jatuh hati suatu ketika dulu. 

indah, awk. lebih indah. 

moga hati sy juga Allah cerahkan.

oh God, did i just call her love? haha. go dai hajar.