Firm. Loyal. Family-first man.
That was what I see in him back then.
When I was a teenager, I've always reminded myself not to find a man with certain characters like dad's.
Cold. Distant. Hot-tempered.
*guilty as charged* That was how I see him back then.
You see, becoming a young lady myself now, I see that I am supposed to possess 'lady' characters.
Gentle. Polite. Good with words.
And good gracious, I don't have any of those characters!
I notice that I am becoming more like how father used to be than I wanted to. Rough. Distant and cold. I can hardly accept people's words. I am ... ... distant.
In many ways, it benefits me a lot. It actually makes me feel good. It gives that relief because I have marked my point. That's it. Few minutes after, I realize that people are not smiling anymore. And the more I realize that it's not good for them in any way.
I knew how they feel 15 years ago. I didn't like it then, I don't like it now. And I don't want to be like that. And if I don't want to see it from other people, why am I becoming one?
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