the last piece of the heart

You see, I wasn't good at handling matters on my own at that time. My temper was all over the place. I didn't know how to deal with people who pushed me into doing things that I didn't like. I didn't know how to act all positive and sunshine after having a bad day. And at the same time, I didn't like the way you talked about other people. The way you were being negative about things around you. How you always thought that people like to burden you unnecessarily. I didn't like listening to your complaints and ramblings about those things, and my patience was not helping either. That was why I was always quiet around you, and I knew that since then, the silence has been misunderstood.

In other words, I had a bad judgment of you. The criticism you put on me every time I wanted advice had been so discouraging, they didn't make you seemed like a 'healthy' friend for me at that time. At the same time, I had displayed you more of my negative side than I should have as your healthy friend. For that, I am truly sorry.

That was a few years ago, and I can't in any way change your perspective on me. Anything I do would seem fake or not good enough. Or maybe it's because we haven't spoken in a while. So I am sorry about that too. But I like the person I'm becoming more and more. There are lots to work on, and I'm happy about it. About working on it. Allah's plan works wonders; it never ceases to amaze me. I'll give you that. May He shower His mercy and blessing. I don't have anything to prove to you, and I'm not going to either.



Hehe. I don't know who's reading this, but it'll be the first, after many many many months, and the last time that I wear my heart on my sleeve. Till then *smiley*